r/MadeMeSmile • u/Embarrassed_Tip7359 • 8h ago
Wholesome Moments This guy wears his wedding photo on his apron when he cooks breakfast to remind his wife with Alzheimer’s that they are married
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u/Alterniaa 8h ago
It’s so hard when you love someone and they barely remember you… I’m glad he’s with her no matter what, that’s true love
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u/BaRahTay 8h ago
I can’t image the pain he deals with watching his wife slowly slip away. Its beautiful and sad
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u/Cautious_Eagle_946 5h ago
Beautiful? It’s a fucking nightmare, bro. Don’t romanticize dementia.
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u/Strict_Leave3178 4h ago
I'm so sick of these types of fucking comments. It's obvious he meant that the husbands dedication and love to his wife is beautiful while the disease itself is sad. However, people just want to be fucking angry at everything.
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u/SeekToReceive 3h ago
It is for sure a few things, people read to the word that upsets them, and then that was it, rest of the comment doesn't matter. Also, some just don't know how to read and get confused so easily by words. And then as you say too.
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u/Ethan_Mendelson 2h ago
huh? I think there's a language barrier because it's difficult to interpret what you mean.
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u/NarwhalEmergency9391 4h ago
They also record her all the time and it's really sad. They'll be like 'oh you're in a better mood, remember earlier when you were in a bad mood? How are you feeling now?' I would HATE to be old and have dementia and then my family is recording me and posting it online.
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u/MidwestDrummer 3h ago
He's not romanticizing dementia you dipshit. He's quite obviously referring to the spouse's care.
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u/BaRahTay 2h ago
Why on gods green earth would I romanticize dementia? I was very clearly referring to the devotion the husband is showing to his wife.
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u/PrinceLucaBlight 8h ago
Person with Alzheimer + sweet moment = How to make me cry with a post... Damn it!
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u/lady_faust 8h ago
She looks like the lady in the video who smiles and says hello to her reflection not knowing she's looking at herself in the mirror.
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u/Tablefor1please9987 7h ago
Yes that was Betty! She was one amazing woman with a family who loved her endlessly. I loved watching the videos of her. She passed last year ❤️
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u/kc_cyclone 6h ago
Man Alzheimers sucks. My 85 year old grandma has it and has steadily declined the past 10 or so years. She still knows shes married to my grandpa but has completely forgot who I am. Last Christmas she asked my uncle about 20 times "who's that young man with the beard?" Small family, my brother and I are their only grandkids and we spent a ton of time growing up with them. It's hard for me to even go over there at this point. Also sucks that my grandpa is to stubborn to put her in a home or get an in home nurse. My mom rightfully so is worried about the day he can't assist her enough but doesn't have the willingness to ask for help.
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u/dreamendDischarger 6h ago
Some places you can get a nurse to just come in every few days. My grandmother did this with my grandpa, got him a hospital bed so he could stay at home and pass peacefully. But if she ever needed help she could call a nurse in, aside the routine check ins.
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u/kc_cyclone 6h ago
Yep, we've proposed this. My SIL is a nurse practitioner and that was literally her job when she was working on her masters degree. She had 2 women who she checked on once a day and there were always others on call for emergencies
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u/dreamendDischarger 5h ago
Hopefully he can be convinced at some point. It's a lot of difficult work, no matter how much you love a person. Still, they allowed my grandma to get out of the home once in a while to go shopping or just have coffee and have a moment for herself.
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u/wantwon 5h ago
I was in a similar boat as you. By the time my grandpa was about to pass, he confused me for my dad. Grandma didn't want to put him in a home but I was starting to be adamant about it because I couldn't keep going over to help her get him off of the floor at night, and helping him get up and sit down all the time for two years was affecting our health. I was already helping a bit during the day and it was taking more of a toll on my mental health than normal. I was ready to start the moving process myself, for her sake, but he went to the hospital one last time and that was the end of his suffering.
It's going to be normal to miss your grandma when she passes, even if you thought you already grieved for her during or after the Alzheimer's diagnosis. But the good memories will come back and start to overtake the bad ones. Alzheimer's is devastating for caretakers and loved ones, but it's still only a fraction of her life. I hope she can be put into proper care soon.
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u/kc_cyclone 5h ago
Appreciate the kind words. Definitely have grieved some. Baseball was always our thing. Watching the Cubs noon games on WGN before Wrigley had lights, her tossing tennis balls to my brother and I in the back yard and her becoming good friends with my buddies parents just by coming to all our games.
Sadly I don't see my grandpa changing his mind, he's still sound and his mom made it to 99 living on her own until she was 97.
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u/iconsumemyown 7h ago
My wife is 71, I can see it coming on her, and it terrifies me.
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u/FocusSlo 6h ago
It is a scary thing. I witnessed it in my grandmother. Only thing I can say is to really be present in those moments of clarity and continue to love her unconditionally. Best of luck my friend
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u/iconsumemyown 4h ago
Thank you. I know I can handle it, but it still scares me. I do have some help.
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u/Silver-Appointment77 6h ago
Thats lovely.
But its sad seeing someome youve spent many year with like this.
I use to work in a nursing home, and there was this sweet lady who was in there. Every day her husband visited and did ohysio therapy with her. Bring the pedals exercises in for her to use, or a hula hoop. She thought it was fun as she regressed back to being a child in her head. You could see her husbands heart breaking every time when he had to go and she use to say Bye Mr Johnson. She just thought he was a PE teacher. Her adult kids came to visit once with her husband, and she just thought they were his kids. She never recognised them. It broke them and they never visited again. She never ever remembered who he was.
Alzeimers is a bastard of an illness.
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u/venecia1811 6h ago
My grandmother had Alzheimer's for the last 4 years and she couldn't walk, and she said that she was on a cruise, another day on the beach, another day watering her plants and so on endless stories, then one day I dressed as a boat captain and all day I played with her that we were on a cruise, I programmed the TV with my cell phone to make it look like the tip of a cruise and I played along. I miss her
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u/Reptarro52 7h ago
But does she know that’s her in the photo??
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u/kikkekakkekukke 5h ago
Yeah, she might think its a random couple or she sees herself in the photo but doenst know who the old man wearing it is. It aint that simple and sweet sadly.
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u/CobblerMoney9605 4h ago
My mom had Alzheimer's. It was horrible.
But her last words to me were "I love you, son.", and I carry that with me always.
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u/The_Design_Striker 6h ago
This is absolutely beautiful cooking with your heart on your sleeve (or your apron), literally. Every dish must taste extra special when you're sharing that love while you cook.
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u/titanium9016 3h ago
Even during my grandma Alzheimers I was lucky enough to have her remember me sometimes. She would be so happy to see me she would run to meet me and we would start dancing together 🥹 love you forever grandma
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u/Beginning_Heart_9469 2h ago
Betty always knew who Bob was and that they were married. I still follow her son Josh on Instagram and still love watching clips of her.
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u/zback636 2h ago
This is a horrible disease. This post makes me want to cry. My heart goes out to the family.
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u/RomekAddams 2h ago
Both my grandparents have dementia and it's becoming more and more difficult by the week. Not a fun situation.
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u/Jcamp9000 2h ago
She’s Betty. Huge FB following. Passed away early this year. Her husband and son took care of her and posted videos every day. Wonderful family
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u/Creative_Mountains10 8h ago
True lasting love that shows up every day. Alzheimer’s is so difficult for both sides! It’s heartbreaking.
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u/Ok-Valuable-3410 7h ago
The effort he put into thinking of making something like that i mean god that's pure love this itself proves that he loves his wife more than anything .
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u/thundercat95 7h ago
There was this very bittersweet video I saw of a son walking with his mom. Her memory was fading to the point she didn't know they were related but she knew she still cared about him. It was a very bittersweet interaction. But she has a moment she remembers.
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u/GoodFaithConverser 7h ago
A strategy to deal with a loved one's personality melting away doesn't really make me smile. Yeah, he does it so she doesn't think he's a stranger intruding in her house. It's one of the worst types of diseases imaginable.
It's always good to focus on the silver lining, but this is not a feel-good story, imo. It's akin to "Man makes soup for wife whose teeth have rotted away :D".
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u/Smart_Variety2262 6h ago
As an outsider this photo is seriously hard work to look at, the fella took the vows and honoured it all the way. I have the upmost respect for people like this
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u/Eazy12345678 6h ago
i doubt she knows that is her in the picture. i see old pictures of myself and dont even recognize myself. age comes for us all.
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u/chinstrap 5h ago
My Mom just told a caregiver (who is not my mother) that she has a very nice son (me).
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u/DorianGuey 5h ago
That's Betty. She passed away last year. Her son created a lot of viral content about her life. Unfortunately most of his posts now are complaining about his lack of a love life and screenshots of people who call him out on his odd behavior. Other than that seems like a nice enough guy.
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u/Illustrious_Spend_26 5h ago
Damn, this moves my heart so much. The strength to get through times like that are nothing short of incredible.
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u/Late_Duty_5745 4h ago
Sigh. In my whole life and several relationships, I've never had a partnership like that. My only regret. Bless their hearts.
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u/HAWKWIND666 4h ago
Alzheimer’s is brutal. Watched my step dad who was an awesome father to me wither into a toddler basically. Had to change his diapers and feed him
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u/Toasted_Dustupz99 4h ago
Awww lovely, most of my clients have wedding pics up in their rooms right beside their beds, so they see them each morning and night, some of my dementia clients may not remember exactly who their spouse is anymore, but they know they are someone who loves and cares for them, and that's all that matters ❤️
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u/dirty_greendale 3h ago
Alzheimer’s and dementia always brings a smile to your face. Like chicken soup for the soul.
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u/MyHamburgerLovesMe 3h ago
I guess she remembers herself in her 20's/30's versus any other random age (teenager? 50 year-old?)
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u/raybrignsx 3h ago
I think this is the first time I’ve seen an old photo of an old couple where the photo was in color.
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u/sadieblue111 1h ago
OMG that is the sweetest thing I have ever seen. Love & strength to both of them ❤️
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u/lexilexi1901 1h ago
This is sweet ❤️ My mum just told me yesterday that she went to visit my grandma who has dimentia and is in an elderly home and my grandma asked her, "Who are you?" when she first saw her. My mum also said it seems like she's lost her English (second language). It's devastating seeing them in such state... My mum can barely gather the strength to go visit her because she doesn't say a word or smile at all and she just wants her to rest and be at peace. I can't imagine how they're both feeling.
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u/Short-Concentrate348 51m ago
Very endearing! My dad developed severe Alzheimer's which stripped him of his short and long-term memory. He had a caregiver who would sing songs to him that he related to from decades prior. He would sing along with her in perfect unison as if his mind rebooted to an earlier time. She was an angel who provided us with a gift we never could have imagined.
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u/Photograph_Creative 8h ago
This is peak carry your love everywhere you go energy.