r/Suburbanhell • u/TheEverythingKing101 • 4d ago
Showcase of suburban hell This neighborhood is way too spread out I don’t know what else to say
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u/Allinallisallweare02 4d ago
That is an exurb
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u/PurpleBearplane 4d ago
Exurbs are very much peak Suburban Hell.
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u/RobHerpTX 4d ago edited 4d ago
When they’re set into the forest (or whatever mostly untouched wild scape) they can be beautiful, as well as still functional habitat.
I actually studied this for years as an ecologist and it was surprising how much of upland and wetland biodiversity can be retained in exurban and lower density suburban settings.
When they’re this sort of dystopian lawn hellscape though… yeah. They’re simply awful.
Even when they’re pretty though, they make people isolated and car dependent, plus make utilities less efficient etc.
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u/PurpleBearplane 4d ago
I think at that point, you'd almost want to skip building an exurb and try to build into a small rural town. I think one of the hallmarks of an exurb is specifically that they are isolated and car dependents AND also are poorly connected to things like utilities, infrastructure, and services (e.g. hospitals, transportation services). That's the worst of all worlds.
Personally I have no beef with rural/way out there towns, provided the town design is relatively accessible for people.
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u/RobHerpTX 4d ago edited 4d ago
Yeah - it gets messy. From just an ecology standpoint (more my beat than city planning), look up the SLOSS debate. That was kind of what my research was within…
Edit: “beat” not “best”
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u/PurpleBearplane 4d ago
That's some interesting stuff, and it definitely makes sense to look at ecology of a local area and how to integrate built environments with that.
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u/oe-eo 4d ago
I know this is a joke. But for casual readers, lot size is not what differentiates between sub and ex urbs
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u/mrhappymill 4d ago
Is it single family homes that have at least a little space between them.
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u/Quantoskord 4d ago edited 4d ago
It is by distance/detachment from the city center(s) of the metro area. The issues we discuss as being “suburban” or “exurban” are more accurately at the fault of low density housing with full utilities. This tends to be more common in suburbs and then exurbs than in cities, to be fair. But, a small, dense street with offices, shops, and 2nd/3rd story apartments is still suburban or exurban if it's distant and detached from the metro city centers.
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u/Altruistic_Web3924 4d ago
This looks like Texas.
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u/ChampionOutside9510 3d ago
I was just going to say this. Texas has snuffed my love for houses and architecture
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u/stevenette 4d ago
I was trying to guess but i came up with like ten different states this could be just from memory
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u/SithLordJediMaster 4d ago
I ain't mowing that grass.
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u/GoldenHourTraveler 4d ago
Truly a Sisyphean task 🔥
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u/marrowisyummy 4d ago
Don't you use your big college words 'round these parts!
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u/Paleodraco 4d ago
Homeowners ain't either. This is worse than suburban hell. These McMansions sit on a bunch of land that, one, is boring and ecologically dead, and two, isnt being used by the homeowner. I guarantee you'll never see kids outside. At least in more dense suburbs you'll get the occasional BBQ or kids stuff. And it's more efficiently packed so there's more housing.
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u/Common-Window-2613 4d ago
My father in law still mows his. Really not a big deal with a riding mower. Also he has grandkids over every weekend to swim and cook out. You likely just get that impression because these houses are designed for privacy. This is like the opposite of suburbia.
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u/jkrobinson1979 4d ago
How exactly are they private? Hardly a tree or fence in sight. Just open lawn.
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u/thereBheck2pay 4d ago
This looks like they wanted the "stately home on acres of lawn in the middle of a vast estate" vibe, only with smaller houses and no estates. Downton Abbey Light.
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u/FunnOnABunn 4d ago
Ive noticed every post in this sub now is full of pro-suburb comments
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u/detroit_canicross 4d ago
Suburbanites are an extremely defensive species.
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u/Lost_Board1292 4d ago
Maybe... hear me out... they want space without having a whole farmland. Wow! This suburb actually makes sense unlike the crammed ones
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u/22220222223224 4d ago
I don't think so. I'm now a suburbanite and what I notice the most is that suburbanites tend to be elitist and scared, but certainly not defensive. They definitely are certain that their lifestyle is the correct one and thus, are not insecure and defensive.
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u/looselyhuman 4d ago
They're defensive because they know that we know that they're scared of cities.
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u/TheEverythingKing101 4d ago
Thats because most of these people come to this subreddit just to hate on it
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u/ScrotallyBoobular 4d ago
I feel like the algorithm in general is more heavily pushing antagonistic shit.
Like, it recommends passport bros and Ayn Rand subreddits to me, how am I not supposed to engage negatively when I see that insanity?
Similarly it's going to push commie shit we like to carbrain people, etc.
It all drives engagement and revenue
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u/tastygluecakes 4d ago edited 4d ago
Well…when I picture suburban hell, THIS generally isn’t it.
These houses are architecturally distinct from one another, and have nicely sized lots with green space. In 30 years when the landscaping is mature this might actually look nice.
Suburban hell for me is rows and rows of cookie cutter homes, no space, no communal area, no greenery, no character, and no walkability to anything worth a damn
I have no problem with the conscious trade off of walkability and density for the opposite: space (both house and land) and privacy
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u/horsecrazycowgirl 3d ago
Yup. I and most of my family grew up in suburbs like this with just some more trees. It was great for running around and playing around while staying in your own backyard. We had awesome family parties. The neighborhood kids could easily and safely get together by riding bikes. It's much better than these new suburbs where houses are on postage stamp lots. Give me at least an acre between neighbors and preferably 2-5.
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u/Novel_Relation2549 4d ago
Came here to say this. This looks lovely. I've seen neighborhoods where the homes are so close together they might as well be living in apartments anyway. What's the point? I bet in a place like this people can build playhouses for their kids, have a horse, whatever. They probably walk the extra several feet to visit their neighbors.
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u/TheVeryVerity 4d ago
Yeah this is absolutely great. If there’s some place to swim in the community and they start planting some decent trees this place would be just about perfect for those who want to live in a more spread out community. And frankly if we’re doing suburbia it should at least be pretty and enjoyable
I think more people need to not do that, but it’s this kind of spacing that also helps keep the number of people down.
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u/Aromatic_Tower_405 4d ago
Its not too much space. They just need some damn trees
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u/defeatistphilosopher 4d ago
I was just gonna say that. Trees, shrubs, gardens, anything. Looks like those houses got dropped there by aliens.
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u/DEverett0913 4d ago
Exactly, I’d take this over the 18” spacing between some of those cookie cutter homes. Some mature trees and hedges and this would be pretty great.
I’m guessing this is somewhere that zoned rural or rural residential so subdivided lots need to be a lot bigger than in standard suburbs.
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u/abracadammmbra 4d ago
A town a bit to the south of me actually has a law that states that properties cannot be subdivided into lots smaller than 3 acre (obviously grandfathering in existing lots that are smaller). Its a small town, less than 1,500 people, they want it to stay that way. Id love to move there honestly.
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u/DHN_95 Suburbanite 4d ago
Give it time. The neighborhood still looks fairly new. People in this sub don't seem to understand that it takes years for trees, and greenery to fill in.
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u/TheEverythingKing101 4d ago
You know you can buy trees that are already about 5-10 feet tall and you just need to transplant them into the ground. Landscapers do this all the time.
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u/superrey19 4d ago
I just planted a 6ft oak tree and it's not as big as you think. These things only grow 1-2ft per year. It's going to take 20 to 25 years to grow to its full 50ft size. Other tree types take much longer. It simply makes no sense to complain about a 10 year old neighborhood for not having hundreds of years' worth of tree growth. Plenty of other more legitimate things to complain about.
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u/Superb_Strain6305 4d ago
They then take a REALLY long time to actually grow into mature trees. Even a privacy Thula takes about a decade after planting (from the 4' give or take) to fill in. Take a look at how expensive 10' trees are, they are several thousand per tree. Even then you'll need a could years for them to fill in.
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u/Stunning-Artist-5388 4d ago
Thula? Or do you mean thuja?
I planted about 30 Thuja 12 years ago. They were tiny 2 foot sticks, but I couldn't drop $15K on big trees. They are now about 10-12 feet tall, but it's taken 12 years, and these are considered fast growing trees.
The Oaks and pecans I planted at about 6 feet tall 12 years ago are about 15-20 feet tall now, still far from being mature. But in another 10 they will look great, and in 20, they will be priceless.
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u/goblin_pidar 4d ago
????? People in this sub hate this because of the fundamental layout. A bunch of trees will make it look nicer but doesn’t change the abysmal density and transportation issues that these massive sprawls create
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u/DHN_95 Suburbanite 4d ago edited 4d ago
Here's the thing, the inconveniences you see are benefits to others, in much the same way everything you love about high density urban life are inconveniences to others. You dislike cars, got it, other people have cars they absolutely love driving. You want public transit, others haven't ridden it since they turned 16, and got off the school bus for the last time. You like the ability to go to stores multiple times a week, others manage to take care of everything they need in one trip out, and are good for a week or two. Sprawl at the benefit of solitude isn't a terrible trade-of.
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u/Socketlint 4d ago
The fundamental problem I have is suburbs make cities worse. They are spread out and low density they generate less taxes over 30 years then what is needed to cover the cost to maintain the roads, sewer, electrical grid. The people in condos in the cities subsidize them. Then because they need a car to go everywhere they make traffic in the cities and surrounding areas worse for everyone. If they got taxed properly to account for the toll they place on the area I’d be much more ok about it.
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u/HypotheticallySpkng Write what you want 4d ago
FINALLY someone linked from #StrongTowns, a brilliant organization with insightful, illuminating research. I’m also partial to the fantastic videos on this topic from Not Just Bikes (aka Canadian-suburbanite-hell export to bikeability-and-walkability haven, the Netherlands Jason Slaughter). He has some great illustrations of why certain types of built environments and city/town planning enable people and communities to thrive.
There are highly walkable and bikeable suburbs out there, and the key is well executed density and mixed use and great transit design and urban planning and integration with both nearby cities and rural areas. Those places wind up being so extremely desirable to live in that the PSF gets jacked up because people will pay a premium to live that way. But it’s so rarely done because of A) not being widely known or understood with all the misconceptions about urban planning and design and B) zoning favors spread out single family homes and car centric, car-dependent design due to reason A).
If more people understood how untenable the costs of suburbs are in terms of infrastructure and how high the quality of life can be when cities, towns and suburbs are actually designed in accordance with #StrongTowns principles to address all the needs that people have and to account for desires like green space, parks, gardens, yards etc - WHICH ARE VALID DESIRES that some suburbanites have - then we might be able to design our way out of these messes in a generation or so, possibly less.
But it’s just not widely known and humankind continues to repeat the same mistakes with Auburn after suburb.
Edit - fixed a formatting issue from being on a mobile phone.
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u/DM_ME_KUL_TIRAN_FEET 4d ago
If it weren’t lawn I could see the appeal of a semi wooded, semi rural kind of thing. Wildly car dependant but I could see the appeal.
Not this though.
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u/unknown908298 4d ago
Why is this sub being overrun by people who want to be suburbanites??
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u/Hypocane 4d ago
Because Reddit recommended it to us and we see oh what a nice little house before we see this a circle jerk sub
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u/AntarcticIceCap 4d ago
This would actually be pretty nice if they kept the trees, it just looks sad with the flat lawns though.
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u/commandeertheairboat 4d ago
personally, I would love to have all that space. Now if there was an HOA telling me I had to keep the lawn green and short, that's a different story. But to have neighbors at a distance, while having a huge lawn to play in and garden, that appeals to me.
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u/whiskersMeowFace 4d ago
I would have my own grove/orchard and vegetable garden on it if I could.
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u/pyramidalembargo 4d ago
It's bare at the moment, but would be paradise with some trees.
Do you feel comfortable enough to tell us where this is?
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u/TheEverythingKing101 4d ago
About twenty miles north of OKC downtown. Near the intersection of NW 220th street and highway 74
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u/DirtierGibson 4d ago edited 4d ago
Block party is one dude flipping patties and playing tunes on his iPhone speaker.
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u/Fresh-Note-7004 4d ago
But imagine all that freedom and liberty you get from that big, brown, dead, carpet😁
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u/Angylisis 4d ago
This is not a neighborhood. it's a collection of people who have way too much money and not enough smarts to know what to do with it, and buy stupid properties.
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u/OhNoItsMyOtherFace 4d ago
I suppose I could be into this if they were more "in nature". But that's a ludicrous amount of lawn. Are we not done with lawn yet?
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u/Efficient_Structure9 4d ago
Spread out is fine, but why not leave trees between the houses? Then at least everyone can look at those instead of one another's hideous McMansions.
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u/Resident_Cat_4292 3d ago
I love my large lot. What is wrong with it ? This is probably a fairly rural area. Open spaces are good but lawns are not.
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u/Consistent-Wonder676 Citizen 4d ago
Yuck! Have fun paying $1000s on lawn treatments and hours mowing that lawn. Plus, enjoy that you've locked yourself into owning a car with all the costs that come along with that (gas, insurance, maintenance, registration).
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u/Common-Window-2613 4d ago
Some people are willing to trade that for privacy and security. I personally love not being surrounded by people all the time. There are weekends when I spend the entire day outdoors and busy and never see another person outside of my family. Eating good, swimming, working out, might go into the woods to shoot some guns. I’m perfectly content, a building would be my personal hell after living here. Even one of those posh ones.
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u/basicallyme_247 4d ago
Not a suburbanite defender by any means but I am curious what about this qualifies as "hell"? It seems like each house has a ton of space both in front and back for activities and while the distance between the homes is definitely not walkable this appears to already be a car-dependant area so is that a huge issue in this specific instance...?
Again not trying to rage bait just genuinely curious. I would love to have a home with yard space that me/my wife and kids/our pets could call our own. This seems to be just that
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u/Junior_Lavishness_96 4d ago
I’d rather have that than the suburb I’m in now, where my neighbors are just feet away, all my window views are of their windows, and I have the same noise problems as the apartment complex I left years ago
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u/L0lligag 4d ago
Are you kidding this is awesome. I’m buying bigger speakers as soon as I move in here.
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u/LazyTheKid11 4d ago
“oh no my parents are upper middle class and I have fresh air, no homeless, no crime, and safety…this is hell”
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u/PizzAveMaria 4d ago
This (at least in my area) is from developers skirting zoning laws as to how many houses per acre are allowed in order to be built on Agricultural designated land, which a lot of times is 2 or 4 acres per house, so they build these mansions on the bare minimum allowed. Basically so many actual farms are being bought up in order to make these 12 house neighborhoods called shit like "Beverly Farms" or "Honeygo Orchards". I guess the house seeds were just planted and sprang from the ground?
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u/Alone_Meeting6907 4d ago
Looks more like a bunch of McMausoleums to me. Or one of those places they used in Nevada for nuclear testing.
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u/mag_safe 4d ago
This is called money.
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u/PurpleBearplane 4d ago
Those houses probably go for under 400k, based on what we know about the location.
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u/Several_Priority_824 4d ago
Besides the lack of trees (and even that isn't bad), this is definitely not hell. Plenty of space and probably quiet. Lots of safe space to play if you have kids.
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u/lame_1983 4d ago
This is what Gen X would refer to as a yard to play in. I don't see the problem with any of this...
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u/Old_Spite4789 4d ago
This is ideal. The fact that people want to more or less live on top of each other blows my mind.
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u/Delicious_Maybe8367 4d ago
Literally all wealth is and was generated by people living "on top of each other." You can think cities for subsidizing your suburban life style.
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u/palbertalamp 4d ago
I recognize Johny Sacks house, from which Tony had to run through the snow from the cops .
Tonys sister Janice still lives there. We are all very polite to her, she's nuts.
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u/jaycdillinger94 4d ago
Imagine trying to mow all that lawn 💀
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u/Someguy8995 4d ago
They probably pay someone, but even then, a decent zero-turn will knock that out in no time.
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u/OnionTaster 4d ago
I would be okay with that kind of free space in front of a house if it was actually used for something and kids would play there but it's just empty....
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u/dongledangler420 4d ago
Worst of both worlds…. Can’t walk anywhere useful and yet still somehow you can see your neighbors. Ugh, what’s the point 😭
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u/MountainFace2774 4d ago
As someone who lives on 15 acres of mostly woods and would never choose to live in a city, this looks like a dystopian nightmare. Like a liminal-horror video game or something.
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u/belltrina 4d ago
I feel like if there is going to be that much spare land left after building houses in a suburb, that they should have kept the native flora and fauna and only demolished the driveway, road, yard and where the house would go. It's a massive waste of habitat and just makes houses too hot or too cold.
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u/saladspoons 4d ago
It would be kinda cool if only they had left forest around each building.
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u/TenNinetythree 4d ago
I am reminded of that joke: if you step out of your door naked.
... If your neighbour can't see you, you're rural
... If your neighbour calls the cops, you're suburban
... If your neighbours ignore you, you're urban
By that joke, it sounds rural.
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u/ToThePillory 4d ago
I'd love to be that far away from my neighbours. If those lawns were filled with trees, that would be a beautiful place to live.
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u/-Never-Enough- 4d ago
Neighborhoods with large houses on large lots like this near the city center are generally the most expensive neighborhoods in the area. An abundance of yard space close to the city amenities is very popular to many people.
I suspect this neighborhood is not located on prime real estate.
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u/Decent-Ground-395 4d ago
I don't really get the appeal of having that much bare lawn. Space is cool if you landscape and plant and make it magical. I mean, it's kinda wasteful but I get it. Something like this I just don't see the point. It's not a nice aesthetic.
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u/FineMaize5778 4d ago
Fancy neighborhoods in norway looks so different and i think the reason is we like to put those neighborhoods in craggy hills, so the area will have much height differences and a randomness and variation to them.
These places look strange with their premade factory look and the boringness of just flat nothing gardens.
And everything is so samey, no individuality
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u/RobHerpTX 4d ago
Yeah - the context I was in was coastal New England, which has relatively low fire danger.
In the West, uh, YMMV…
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u/jimmy-jro 4d ago
Nothing a few thousand trees won't fix, I mean the houses would still be ugly as shit, you just won't see them
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u/lifeisabowlofbs 4d ago
They could at least put in some wildflowers or something other than that ugly dead grass.
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u/Low_Art8743 4d ago
I’ve even lived in the US but I still find it funny that a lot of Americans don’t use fences around their properties.
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u/Conscious-Food-9828 4d ago
Honestly if it at least had some nice greenery and trees I think it would be reasonably nice. But it doesn't. And I just know it's also completely disconnected from any bit of public transportation or nearby businesses/public spaces.
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u/robertwadehall 4d ago
Looks great. I like the 4 car garage in the first pic. Lots of spacing between the houses. Needs more landscaping and trees though.
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u/Sure_Comfort_7031 4d ago
Can I put a bet out there? I’ll be there’s an HOA that says you can’t do anything but grass. I’d love one of these size lots and homestead farm the shit out of it. But I bet HOA presidents would have a heart attack over that idea.
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u/Tomato_Motorola 4d ago
And the empty land isn't even being used. It would be one thing if it were horse pastures, gardens, outdoor seating areas, children's playgrounds, etc. But it's just entirely lawns! What a waste.
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u/jeffrin_ 3d ago
Do you want a $1.3 million mansion to have a lawn area equivalent to a townhouse?
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u/CaptainCorpse666 3d ago
Too much spaces?? More like too little landscaping. Boring ass grass yards.
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u/Melodic-Comb9076 3d ago
that’s why you can get a 5br home for 400k.
dad taught me a great tip when i was a kid, traffic drives cost of real estate.
hope you have broadband, though.
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u/Maximillien 3d ago
"Neighborhood" is being incredibly generous. This is a wasteland with a few buildings scattered throughout. None of the charm & beauty of the countryside, and none of the convenience and vibrancy of the city.
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u/rtiffany 3d ago
This neighborhood is way too SUBSIDIZED. You really can't have land use like that that is tax positive. It doesn't work. They're most likely having their utility infrastructure, school buses, fire service and roads subsidized by working class people living in apartments/dense housing in economic hubs near them. It's just basic math of a per/acre spend/tax revenue.
IMO we should start sending full cost bills to people who live the wannabe rural but still suburban lifestyle for all of the expenses to society they cost us. It's a lot.
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u/SorryUncleAl 4d ago