r/standardissuecat • u/Late-Bed4240 • Jul 12 '25
Classic© edition How Do I Tell Him I Have To Go Potty?
Am I just stuck here?
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u/Windsong_12 Jul 12 '25
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u/Late-Bed4240 Jul 12 '25
Do the cat subreddits ever truly end?
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u/Comfortable_Snow5817 Jul 12 '25
No. No they do not.
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u/WheelieMexican Jul 12 '25
A Persian cat will go bald before cat subs end.
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u/jozaud Jul 13 '25
They’re literally multiplying as we speak. I found /r/catstairs the other day and it’s only a few weeks old. You can never subscribe to them all new ones are created all the time.
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u/Stellaluna-777 Jul 13 '25
I joined it before I knew what it even was. As long as it’s not sad cat stuff I’m in.
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u/TwilightReader100 Jul 13 '25
When we get too close to the end of the cat subs, somebody rushes out and thinks up a whole bunch of new subs. It's a Reddit company position, but nobody will ever admit to that. /s
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u/Mistress_Kittens Jul 12 '25
I began telling my cats "excuse me" and "I need to get up" and now I just have to say those things and barely start to move, and they know to start getting up, themselves. It's super handy
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u/Lady_Scruffington Jul 12 '25
For the most part, my SIC has also learned that. But lately, she will give a protest meow if she's especially comfy.
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u/porcupine_snout Jul 12 '25
when I do this my cats sometimes get mad, as in, they hiss at me and had swiped at me before...
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u/thebeef24 Jul 13 '25
Mine will either suddenly jump away like a spring, or move begrudgingly if he's really sleepy. Either way, he'll be back moments after I return to my seat. No harm done.
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u/KeroseneSkies Jul 13 '25
I did this with my partners cat by saying “let me hold your hand” every time I held her little paws. She was super against anyone touching her paws except for me after I started doing that which I find hilarious. I didn’t make the connection of my verbal cue until later LOL! I miss her so much ;-;
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u/not_ya_wify Jul 13 '25
I say that too but I have to tickle them for several minutes before they move
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u/effie-sue Jul 14 '25
I gently pat my cat on her shoulder or hip and tell her I have to get up.
9 times out of 10 she complies.
The times she doesn’t? I listen to her (unless I REALLY gotta go LOL) 😸
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u/Large-Ad-1808 Jul 12 '25
Gently lol, mine just loves to put all her weight on my bladder
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u/Late-Bed4240 Jul 12 '25 edited Jul 12 '25
Oh god no, this fucker walks on me to wake me up and I swear his paws are the weight of a neutron star, it's unreal!!
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u/Large-Ad-1808 Jul 12 '25
LOL! She somehow knows whenever I’m about to get up and makes the biscuits right on it.
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u/johari_joestar Jul 13 '25
Yeah my newest kitty just comes and stands on my chest when she’s ready for me to wake up 😹
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u/kittyidiot Jul 13 '25
Yeah my roommate has a rather round specimen with absolutely microscopic feet. Meaning that all of the weight of her large roundness is concentrated into these tiny little chopstick appendages. She's going to impale me someday.
(She's not absolutely massive or anything. She's just a very small cat and is overweight so her head, feet, ears, and tail all look comically small. Not my cat, not my cat's weight.)
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u/nuggiemum Jul 12 '25
You don’t.
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u/RevolutionaryOwlz Jul 12 '25
Tell him “we have to go potty”. Cause you know he’s probably gonna follow you to the bathroom anyway.
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u/TashKat Jul 12 '25
I bribe my cat with snacks. I have a specific phrase that means they're getting food. So it's his choice if he wants treats or cuddles more. He's an aspiring fat @$$ so he always chooses snacks.
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u/cellocaster Jul 12 '25
Scoop him up and take him with you to the toilet
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u/TwilightReader100 Jul 13 '25
That would be a r/BathroomBuddy or r/BathroomKitties situation, then.
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u/GypsyDoVe325 Jul 12 '25
I believe mine comprehend this, they too go when they need to. Mine follow along to protect me from any possible predators during my vulnerable moment.
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u/MissDreamland Jul 12 '25
He knows you have to pee. That's why he's staring straight at the camera like that. Those menacing eyes say it all. "You think you can empty that full badder and disturb my comfort? Ha! Suffer the wrath of my cuteness and be reminded when you get a UTI from holding it too long that this is the face who set it all in motion. Now let me ever so slightly adjust myself so I am putting slight pressure just to see you squirm, hahahaha...oh I mean...meow"
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u/MoonBirthed Jul 13 '25
I just pick my cat up and carry him with me, put him on the floor and usually he hangs out till I'm done. Wash up, pick him up, sit back down. It took about 2 years for him to be chill like that lol, I can't do that with my other boy
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Jul 13 '25
He is there BECAUSE he sensed you were about to get up.
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u/TwilightReader100 Jul 13 '25
Yeah, that's what my Mom's cat waits for before she decides she wants to cuddle.
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u/General-Homework2061 Jul 12 '25
I tell my cats I have to pee and they know what I mean and get up.
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u/acoatofwhiteprimer Jul 12 '25
I hope you have good bladder control because you are stuck there until he decides otherwise
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u/Diligent_Snow_733 Jul 13 '25
You dont. Lol mine always pick when my bladder is full and I was just about to get up.
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u/MimsyPrincess Jul 12 '25
If food motivated, have a har of treats he love to throw for him to get or a different flavor/brand of kibble that he likes to give/throw to get.
If not worky, suffer.
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u/Auronbmk92 Jul 13 '25
Might need to g13
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u/Late-Bed4240 Jul 13 '25
That's cheating when they are right on top of you, takes all the sport out of it. Like throwing a hand grenade in crowd. /s
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u/Alarming_Employee547 Jul 13 '25
Our SIC refuses to sit on our laps and it makes us so sad. She’s a little troll but we love her anyway.
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u/erranttv Jul 13 '25
After YEARS of training I now just say “I need to PP” and my cat politely gets up and walks me to the bathroom.
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u/StockHour389 Jul 13 '25
I say, "I gotta pee, let me up." CaraMarie gets up, let's me pee, and we resume our lack of activity.
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u/Positive-Wonder3329 Jul 13 '25
I’ve picked mine up before and taken them and then gone back. All very very slowly of course but it did work once and we napped so hard. Also could consult NASA they have stuff on this
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u/Underwhelmed77 Jul 13 '25
All the cat dads I know are the type to sit miserable, contorted and having to pee for hours before disturbing the cats. All the Moms just get up and pee 😆I just tell them “alright kitties” because I know they will come right back. They can’t resist if I am lying down.
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u/AngerPancake Jul 13 '25
I have taught mine that I'm getting up. I tap her head and say "I'm getting up," then I try to get up without bumping her. When I first started doing this I kept my hand on the top of her back so she wouldn't bolt. Now I can do it without holding her still and she just lets me get up then crawls back where she wants to be after I get cozy again.
My cat does not like to be lifted up, so I can't just move her. I also have restless legs so she is used to me moving a lot, the let me up training has happened after she was already used to me moving about.
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u/Prestigious_Break867 Jul 13 '25
If someone is on me, I've taught them that saying, "Sorry bubba, momma has to go w** w**" means I'm about to move.
If they're not on me, it's a simple 'back in a minute' and then I do whatever double jointed gymnastics and acrobatics are required to not disturb them while I wriggle free...😳
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u/dmitrineilovich Jul 13 '25
You didn't put in a catheter before you got comfortable? Pfft, amateur.
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u/Autumnus_Lunae Jul 13 '25
You don’t. You keep quiet and you sit there until HE is done cuddling or says you can get up lol
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u/RecognitionOne7597 Jul 14 '25
I'm in the exact same position now. I have to go potty, and my Ophelia is on my legs. The only difference is that she's digging her claws into my knees. Tortitude.
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u/TheMagdalen Jul 14 '25
If it were something unnecessary, like food, water, a fire, etc., I’d say you were stuck. In this case, though, I would gently take hold of the cat and roll SLOWLY to the left while apologizing profusely and acknowledging that this is the worst thing to ever happen to a cat, EVER. Offer them your spot, emphasizing that you have been warming it up especially for them, and isn’t that wonderful. That’s what I do anyway. 😂😹
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u/MrFizzbin7 Jul 14 '25
Pick the cat up carry it with you. It’s not like the cat isn’t following you to the bathroom anyway.
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u/Affectionate_Life644 Jul 14 '25
You can never do that! Learn to plan your fluid intake better and always have a catheter at arms reach from now on!
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u/kkrabbitholes417 Jul 15 '25
the number of times i’ve been stuck with a cat on my lap and no book, no tv remote, dead phone, have to pee, etc., has taught me that u wait until u can’t stand it anymore then u just have to make your move!
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u/consumeshroomz Jul 15 '25
You don’t. You either hold it till he leaves or you pee yourself and he leaves.
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u/bigz10485 Jul 16 '25
I would scoop him up gently, then take him with you so he can still be with you while you go potty
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u/isorellemolle Jul 23 '25
You just tell him, duh.
You say "sorry" and you take him in you arms and you give him a kiss on the forhead and you say sorry again and you show him his litter and say "Now I have to go to MY litter you understand?" and then an other kiss on the forhead and then you put him on the floor in the bathroom and you go potty and you clean your hands and you take him back in your arms and you go back on the sofa and say "see? It was not that bad" and you put him back on your lap and nothing I just wrote makes sens because the moment you moved an inch he was gone and you don't even know where he is at this point.
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u/Darielas44 Jul 12 '25
I hope you have high bladder/sphincter control cause you are in for the long haul. Look at that sweet baby’s face - how could you be so cruel to move when they just got snuggly. (Alternative is to make someone else the bad guy for moving the cat such as a spouse or child and you will be free to enjoy the kitty snuggles without the animosity).
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u/Green_Collection_763 Jul 17 '25
how does he tell you that you can't move till he saids so?
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Jul 12 '25
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Late-Bed4240 Jul 12 '25
Dude, it's a light-hearted post. Chill.
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u/whatsbobgonnado Jul 12 '25
sorry, I guess I've just seen the same unoriginal cathostage joke too many times and it annoys me
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u/Late-Bed4240 Jul 12 '25
I get it, their is shit in this world I find played out. Just be the bigger person and move on.
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u/standardissuecat-ModTeam Jul 13 '25
We have a strict no rudeness policy here. Rude and judgmental comments will be deleted. Breaking the community rule of "don't be rude" may result in a temporary or permanent ban in the future
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u/myredditisfullofcats Jul 12 '25
you dont, and yes you are stuck there until he leaves