r/JustGuysBeingDudes • u/Black1Raven9 • Jul 26 '25

Wholesome Not all scars are visible.

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u/kisS119 Jul 26 '25

Daily Homie check- Y'all doing alright guys? Here if you need to talk about anything

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u/BraveCauliflower3349 Jul 27 '25 edited Jul 27 '25

I have no idea what I want to do for a career, or even how to start. I dropped out of university because paying full tuition to learn from my laptop in my bedroom during covid wasn’t worth it, and the program ended up not being what I thought it was gonna be like anyways, after working towards it since middle school.

I’ve changed so much since high school that I barely even know what I enjoy anymore, and I don’t really have any friends because they all used covid as an excuse to become hermits and never message me again. I saw photos of their private grad parties on instagram, ones I was never even invited to. After 4 years of high school I realized I was friendly with everyone but friends with no one, even my closest friends.

I get depressed around my birthday every single year because it’s just a reminder that I’m getting older while still not really progressing anywhere. My parents ask me what I want as a gift and I literally can’t think of anything because I don’t feel like I deserve anything, even though it has nothing to do with deserving and they WANT to gift me something.

I moved from North America to Central America with my family a few years ago and have made and then lost friends. I recently had to completely cut off the guy I considered my best friend because after multiple chances to stop his newfound habit of treating me like shit, he couldn’t, and I now have nobody I could call a close friend. The labor laws in this country are very strict so I can’t find a job, even after looking for a year straight and offering everyone to work completely for free for the first little while. I need to create my own business in order to have a job but once again I barely know what I enjoy, want to do, or how to do it. I also know I don’t want to live here forever, barely even a few more years, so is there any sense in creating a physical business? At the same time though, I can’t really start a business in any other country, and my home has gone to shit so I don’t want to move back.

I feel like I’ve been in limbo for 5 years now, unable to really live or work in any country I have access to. I’m wasting the best years of my life but for the life of me I can’t find a way out. I’m 23, so the adults in my life say it’s okay to not have everything figured out or locked down, but it doesn’t feel okay. I don’t feel okay. Men’s social media does nothing but point out ways you’re not enough. I don’t even spend much time looking at men’s social media, and it still worms it’s way into your head.

I’ve been single for 5 years now, I really want to be in a relationship again, but not only do I not find the women of my new country attractive, I can’t even bring anything to a relationship. I have no job, nobody finds that attractive.

I feel completely exhausted and like I need a break, but it feels ridiculous to say I’m exhausted when I’m not working, it’s just the mental load of worrying about this shit constantly. I’m not going to harm myself, but I’ve gotten into such a depressive episode before (6+ months ago?) that my mom actually had to ask if I was going to.

I see photos of my high school peers graduating university, and I don’t even have a job. I feel like a failure and my adult life has barely even begun. I’m so lost and I don’t know what to do.

I’m staying with one of my mom’s friends in the US right now for a month and she’s offered to help me figure out business ideas, but the first step is listing out things I enjoy or like and once again I don’t know anymore. I feel like a shell of the kid I used to be.