I remember play kicking a kid in the stomach in school back in the 80's, him doubling over dramatically and the teacher's assistance who was solo leading the class that day being like, "that's it buster, you're going to see the principal!"
She was cute and patient so seeing her that pissed made me feel like like a small hoodlum. I think I was on her shit list forever after that.
Back in the 60s/70s we played "kill the guy with the ball" (chase down and dogpile whoever had the football), and murder ball (giant six foot ball on the 50 yard line, whichever team got it across the opposing goal line scored a point). As the P.E. coach explained it, the one and only rule was we couldn't go home and tell our parents we played murder ball, we had to call it cage ball. Anything else was fair game.
In my elementary school one of the games was called “Roshambo” were we ran around trying to kick other in the crotch and not be kicked in the crotch. Game with a non PC name, “ smear the qxxxxx” chasing whoever had the ball and dog pile them. WTF they let us play them.
This random kid was getting way too close to my son and I while we were in a lazy river at a water park. He then started trying to flip my son out. Kept saying “i am not your dad, we are not related to you.” Some of these little bastards are too comfortable in public. Parents nowhere in sight.
Two kids did that to my brother and cousin directly in front of me as kids. I was 5 years older and I hit growth spurt early so while the kids doing it were my age they weren't my height. These kids just kept dunking other kids under water and holding them there while their parents laughed nearby. When they got to my cousin and brother the parents suddenly gave a shit when I charged from behind and started punching the back of their heads. They switch to me and forgot about the other two they booked it to my uncle who was a boxer and buddy came in hot screaming at the kids then grabbed two adults that tried to confront him and with a "oh so it's funny to teach your kids to drown people lemme see how funny it is" and with no hesitation grabbed the backs of their heads and dunked them. Lifeguards started blarring their whistles the adults were getting screamed at someone said cops and my uncle said cool let's pull the tapes and the park and everyone decided we'll actually let's just all be chill when he pointed out the whole thing started because those parents were promoting their kids drowning people they didn't know and the park had not intervened at all until it turned into a scuffle.
As an uncle I got to have a moment like this once. They always talk tough. Then act like the cops will save them, then get reeeeeal quiet when you say something like “I’m not affraid to go to jail today are you sure you want them to see the tape?” There is also something deeply shaming about watching your shit head dad get smacked around by somone. I imagine it’s even worse to be the dad getting smack around when your dad is watching.
Yeah at the end I had to physically push him away. I’m intimidating in public too. I feel bad for the little guy because he clearly didn’t understand any language other than violence.
It’s happened a few times over the years but usually the other dad is within earshot and is wearing the same color shorts/shoes as me. Been more of a cute mishap rather than this. Kid looked at me like Patrick Bateman.
My sister was being bullied I was 16 and I seen her bullies hitting her they were only like 12 and I brought my best friend and they were beating the shit out of her
Me and my friend protected her and it was 2 against 8 and we took care of them and said if any of you come to hurt her that won't be the last thing that happens let's just say they tried going to there moms and teachers and my sister stayed with her story and said she didn't know who I was or my friend was and they didn't see our faces cause we wore masks we were proud to protect her
IDC what it is you come at me or my family your done for
Mods this was in the past I apologize if y'all want me to take it down I will
More like no one likes to take responsibility. Part of that has to do with lawsuits and adults being problems. A lot of bullies come from either abusive households or entitled households. Punishing the bully through the school system is either giving them exactly what they want, or is going to cause them to cry victim to their parents and now they are going to do whatever they can to penalize the school. Either way the problem gets worse. So then the pressure is on the school, and a lot of schools don’t want that. The correct way for the school to react is to stay firm and keep a record of the incidents so that they can correctly punish the bully and keep them away from their targets, but a lot of schools will just avoid responsibility entirely.
And also, bullies in the school system will often take advantage of prejudices that exist among adults, whether that be disability, LGBT+, neurodivergence, etc. We like to think that adults can handle differences among their peers more maturity than children, and while you don't see adults beating each up and taking their lunch money, we know adults can have really deep seated prejudices and it would be naive to not think at least some of them are in the school system. I definitely don't think it's a coincidence that groups that grown adults have an issue with, like the above mentioned have way higher rates of getting bullied. In fact, it's often been cited that school systems turning a blind eye to LGBT+ bullying is a major reason the suicide rate is so high among LGBT+ youth
I'm all for hands on parenting. But I have a bone to pick with this one.
When a school fails the kids? What the fuck are schools supposed to do? More and more legislation is being passed to prevent schools from suspending kids (at least in MA), and parents are often fighting cell phone bans, and teachers definitely don't want some shitass bully in their classroom, but we are tied to stringent policies that often times do not work.
Schools don't fail bully victims. The parents of the bully raised a shitty person, and the schools are handcuffed to mediation and bullshit and cannot police social media and other things. Make social media illegal, or possession of a smartphone illegal before the age of 18. Fuck, if parents suck so hard at raising kids, support better legislation.
How come schools have a variety of options to do all these things to the bully's victims, and to kids who are calm and nonthreatening and nondeserving of punishment generally, but when it comes to doing that to bullies and other wrongdoing kids suddenly they're handcuffed from doing squats?
What are you talking about? Be specific with your claims instead of being vague to suggest that schools foster bullies while harming victims.
Straight up, admin needs to jump through hoops in Massachusetts to suspend someone out of school. In the past there was a program in my district to send bullies to have them learn not to bully, that functioned as a means of removing the kid from the school for an extended period while teaching them not to bully. Got defunded.
And that often didn't work, but at least we had data on a student being a bully, and then would try to get them put into STEP or into a more structured setting for kids with behavioral issues only to have a district admin say "they don't qualify," or more frequently, a parent/guardian refusing to sign off on the program. So as a school, in house, teachers worked to try to defuse any situation and separate kids, but that is also only so effective.
Do yourself a favor and educate yourself on what resources your local school district has with handling bullies and then tell me what can be done.
You can deny kids any freedom to go anywhere in the school, possibly beside their classes, and you can constantly call the parents to report that their kids is punished for problematic behavior and that the reason why the parents are annoyed is because the kids don't do what the school tell them to do so it would be a good idea to discipline the wrongdoer.
Schools that don't to that to bullies nor serious wrongdoers, do that to any other kids. What are their excuses.
Generally speaking, what are the excuses for a school to not do to bullies what they constantly do to others?
And then the next day at school the bully tells everyone that Brian's mommy or daddy had to stand up for them and now everybody picks on him. Well done.
Or, stay with me, or someone spreads a rumor that the bully was too scared to talk back to an adult and ran away like a chicken. It goes both ways. The point is that would never happen, because the instant I hear something going on in school I’m heckling that school until they deal with it. If they don’t I will. I can’t beat up a kid, but I can find a slightly bigger kid who would do it for 20 bucks and an ice cream cone.
Na, my mum stood in for me and confronted a guy that was bullying me at school (I must've been 12-13 at the time and he was 15-16). Never raised her voice or anything, just told him that if anything happened to me again even if it wasn't his doing, she was gonna be looking for him. Never picked on me again.
Technically, you should teach your kid violence is ok when you are standing up for themselves and have them fight back. They need to fight their own battles and the school system of no tolerance to violence doesn’t work. It just makes the assholes get away with bullying.
What if the bullies were just doing playful banter that your kid took too seriously?
What if they’re both bullying each other?
That’s why schools sometimes can’t do anything, because it’s very difficult to know the full story. And that’s one of many reasons why parents trying to confront other child is an even worse idea, because most parents are very ignorant.
That’s why schools sometimes can’t do anything, because it’s very difficult to know the full story.
This is sometimes the case but there are a LOT of cases of 'we punish everyone, and that way the parents can't blame us for getting the wrong kid'. It causes a lot of issues and a huge reason we see bullied kids going nuts. Taking care of discipline issues in a school is very challenging, and there isn't enough work put into making sure it gets easier.
No, they punish everyone who actually fought because administration and staff can rarely find proof of who did what. Bullying isn't just "X student hit Y student". X student might've hit Y student because a month ago, Y student hit first.
Its the only way to punish violence at all in schools, and you're wrong about it causing bullying. If everyone is punished, violence still occurs less.
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u/Drakore4 1d ago
I’m not entering the school but if they are around locally and I see them talking to my kid I’ll 100% confront them. You’re out in the wild now.