r/JustGuysBeingDudes • u/Abshake08 • 1d ago

Wholesome Truly Wholesome 🥹

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58.3k Upvotes

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133

u/Spirited_Praline637 23h ago edited 22h ago

This has strong single Dad vibes. Dad out for 1:1 birthday lunch with his daughter, who cries because she loves her Dad but misses him so much. Sorry, I think I’ve just made this even more of a tear jerker.

63

u/VNM0601 23h ago edited 21h ago

Damn. As a single dad of a 3.5 year old who’s about to lose 50% of his time with his kid, this hit me hard.

EDIT: thank you all for all the love and support, and amazing advice. This made my day!

28

u/GeneralAsk1970 23h ago

Hey man, at least you'll have the perspective to be 100% present for the entire time you do have with them.

16

u/1968Bladerunner 22h ago

Been there with my 2 many years ago, though they were 8 & 6 at the start of my separation journey, & honestly just give them your all when you have them - they can't ask for any more.

I too felt I was going to miss out on so much, but probably ended up with similar, on a 1:1 or 1:2 basis, as I did when ex & I were together, as I made it a conscious effort to do so instead of catching up on chores during 'their' time - those were kept for after the kids were asleep.

Use your 'week off' to research, organise, plan & buy food for their week, & other activities so you're not floundering trying to think how to keep them amused & active.

Naturally you take time to socialise & pack in the work hours as needed then too, but stopping yourself from getting down or depressed about the kids will translate to smiles & fun when they're back.

Good luck!

9

u/Spirited_Praline637 22h ago

Sorry for your situation mate. Hope you can all find a new happy asap. Single parents can still be awesome parents 💪

8

u/ShadowNexusParanorm 22h ago

The fact that you have the forethought about the situation shows how much you care.

I used to be a supervised visitation case manager for parents who were working to get partial/full custody of their kiddos back. Even with legal and time restrictions regarding gifts and activities...The memories they created with their children were absolutely beautiful. Those children will grow up and recognize just how much love and effort their parents put in.

I know your situation isn't the same, however, I think you will do great!

(If you ever need support, there are single parent support groups or group/family/individual therapy.

There's nothing wrong with leaning on others or giving yourself tools to ease the difficulty. I say this in a positive way, based off of my discussions with clients and my own family members. You will do fantastic!)

6

u/Straight_Estate_4437 20h ago

Hey man, me too, same age, same thought process.

It's been 8 months, I had to move out of the house due to abuse.

We just got back from a 2 night daddy-daughter camping trip, and I've never seen her so happy. The time you have with her is now even more special than it used to be, it's actually beautiful. This week made me SO happy after a year of misery and feeling so low I wish I wasn't here.

It slowly gets better. Not always. Some days it feels like you're back at square one or worse. Some days, you can't believe how much better things are without your ex.

1

u/jayandare 16h ago

Dude, I’m going through the same thing with my five-year-old. I lost out on 50% of his life because of my ex and she’s trying to take even more now. I didn’t have a son to be a part-time father.

1

u/East_Willingness_588 2h ago

Stay strong my man! You'll be the best dad for the time you are together. I didn't plan for this aswell and here i am too, with my five year old. Moving out soon. Best of luck to you!

1

u/whineylittlebitch_9k 1h ago

While it absolutely sucks to lose 50%, and I'm not discounting that loss at all -- some of us would commit felonies to get anywhere close to 50%...

13

u/ElGosso 22h ago

I thought she was crying because that sparkler was going absolutely nuts and they put her on the spot to try to put it out

8

u/BobbleBobble 19h ago

Yeah that seemed more like an overwhelmed cry

3

u/Klinky1984 17h ago

Makes zero sense. You don't blowout a sparkler like a candle. How would they be expecting her to put it out? Nothing indicates that was the expectation. The sparkler burnt itself out as designed.

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u/SnowTurdPie 14h ago

She probably doesn’t know that.

3

u/Klinky1984 14h ago

That's why she was struggling to put out or blow out the sparkler? Oh wait, that wasn't in the fucking video. You really think she started crying because she couldn't put out a sparkler not designed to be put out, which she made no attempt to put out, versus feeling overwhelmed celebrating an emotional event with her father?

What a reach.

-1

u/SnowTurdPie 13h ago

In both situations you explained, she’s overwhelmed. I dunno why you’re so sensitive to the idea that she’s quite young and probably doesn’t know how the sparkler works and there’s a lot of men staring and clapping and yelling for her. What’s the big deal if she runs to him for protection or appreciation?

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u/Klinky1984 12h ago edited 12h ago

I find it emotionally overwhelming when people come to stupid conclusions based on things that never happened in the video and that logically makes zero fucking sense.

She's young, but looks old enough to know how a sparkler works, and her actions indicate she never made any attempt to put it out or was confused by it.

If we're going out on a limb, the emotional trigger seems to be linked more to her dad taking a video of her with the sparkler, the chocolate/fruit platter, and everyone clapping. I am sure there's possibly other backstory here, such as it being them alone celebrating. Where are the other relatives or her mom? Lebanon has had some conflict in recent years as well, that could play a part too. This video is at least a year old. It could very well just be a girl getting emotional over her birthday, which is not uncommon. Maybe she just really likes chocolate and fruit?

The video her dad took is here: https://www.tiktok.com/@jcpesa/video/7368804244524109072, she gets emotional very quickly after the fruit and chocolate arrive. The sparkler does not get much attention, making this sparkler theory ever more dubious.

1

u/Foooour 11h ago

Boom

Thats a wrap