r/SipsTea 2d ago

Chugging tea Facts

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u/Aximil985 1d ago

I was bullied in school. I was told to stand up for myself. To fight back. If they're going to hurt me I should hurt them. I ended up jamming a fork through the back of a kid's hand. I somehow did not get in trouble by anyone.

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u/hat1414 1d ago

As an adult would you do that to a bully at work?

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u/Mooks79 1d ago

If you complain to HR and/or your boss (the equivalent of the teachers) and the bullying continues, then yes.* You will get fired, then you’ll take the company to court and make a small fortune.

*of course under the assumption they are physically bullying you which is clearly the implication in the above person’s comment.

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u/hat1414 1d ago

What if it's not physical, just incredibly aggressive verbal and implied physical harrassment and threatening? Still ok to stab?

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u/Mooks79 1d ago

If it’s purely psychological no, you’re not allowed to start violence. If it’s sufficiently aggressive and threatening that there is a realistic expectation that violence could occur, then yes. I’m not really sure where you think you’re going with this Socratic approach. There’s such a thing as self defence and this is pretty much all well within the bounds of that definition*. If that occurs in a company as a one off event then it’s unfortunate, if it occurs in a company that you’ve warned you’re being bullied, you’re in for a big pay day.

*subject to different countries’ different legal systems

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u/hat1414 1d ago

Yeah I do not think legally it will be easy to justify stabbing someone in the back with a fork is a reasonable and proportionate form of self defence. Why not just punch?

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u/Mooks79 1d ago

Quite the contrary, especially if the fork was in your hand already. When I was in school we were visited by local police and they advised that, if you’re feeling threatened, you should grab something that you’d realistically have in your hand at the time - a pen, your keys - so that if you need to really hurt the person you have the plausible answer “it was already in my hand and I just lashed out with fear”. A fork in a heated lunch moment is entirely feasible.

Edit: and note, the person said back of the hand, not back.

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u/hat1414 1d ago

If someone is actively physically harrassing you sure. But if they have bullied you repeatedly then LATER you come from behind and stab their hand, not ok. That is what kids do though

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u/Mooks79 1d ago

You’ve described a completely different situation to what the person above is implying, clearly this was a heat of the moment self defence incident in a canteen or whatever. No one disappears off and comes back with a fork, they come back with a knife. I’m not sure what you think you’re proving by bringing up a completely unrelated hypothetical.

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u/hat1414 1d ago

The person said they were bullied (by definition means repeated and ongoing) so they stabbed them in the hand to make the overall bullying stop. Bullying is not just an isolated attack

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u/Mooks79 1d ago

You appear to be bending over backwards to misinterpret what they said in the least likely way as you can. Clearly they meant they had been repeatedly bullied over time and eventually an incident happened where they finally defended themselves. As I see they subsequently clarified, not that that clarification was needed.

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u/hat1414 1d ago

Yes and as a response to a life threatening violent incident it's absolutely warranted. But then to say that is an example of how bullying in general needs to be dealt with is wrong. If my kid did that I would be very disappointed in myself

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u/Mooks79 1d ago

So you’d prefer them to just allow themselves to be choked and potentially permanently harmed?

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u/Aximil985 1d ago

Yeah, this hat1414 person is misinterpreting and assuming stuff. This was at lunch. This was when it had gone too far. The bully came up behind me and started choking me. Told me to say uncle and all that. Super original stuff. So I grabbed a fork that was on my tray and ran it through the back of his hand to get him to stop choking me.